Ladybugs on Cocaine, Taylor Swift and How to Start A Blog
Sartaj Dhami
Google “how to start a blog”.
Half read the instructions, think you got it, and then go back and actually read the instructions.
Become afraid of commitment and just open Word and decide to write the blog before you actually blog.
Open Word. Stare back at blinking cursor.
Spend approximately 15 minutes choosing the font you are in the mood for. (my current mood is coffee high+baby is napping high with a splash of exhaustion). There is no font for my mood so I’m just going with Arial Narrow (which doesn’t matter because it turns into standard blog font when I copy and paste), although DotemChe did look tempting.
Wonder who comes up with font names.
Wonder what my font name would be. (Your pet’s first name+ the street you grew up on + Sans Bold).
Write. Rinse. Repeat. Publish.
Compulsively check for “likes” which give you tiny little euphoric highs, like a tiny little ladybug doing tiny little bumps of cocaine.
Worry you are being judged. Worry you look like an idiot. Spiral into self-doubt. Become angry at imaginary judgers. Tell imaginary judgers to judge the f-off. Tell yourself you don’t care what the judgy judgers think. Think to yourself “haters gonna hate”.